Nobody invites the Wicked Witch of the West to come have cake

I recently got a promotion at work. In a strange turn of events not one but three different people came out of the woodwork wanting me to come work for them when I put in for a recent opening. I view this as a strange turn of events because one day I’m sitting at my desk minding my own business and the next day there’s a parade of higher ups dropping by. My desk is usually very quiet. Usually the most excitement I have all day is announcing there are Krispy Kreme donuts in the break room. I’m like a human public address system for food. I also announce what they are serving at luncheons and where cake and punch can be found. I’ve even been known to rate the quality of the cake versus the travel time to go get a piece for anyone that can’t decide if it’ll be worth it. Although, honestly, when is cake not worth getting up for?

My promotion will be temporary. That’s my favorite thing about it. Because I like options. Specifically, I like to have an escape clause in case something ends up sucking really, really bad. Not that I go in thinking it will. But what if.

A friend asked me today if I’ll turn into the Wicked Witch of the West upon taking the promotion. I admitted that it was unlikely as it takes a lot of time and energy to be the Wicked Witch of the West. I have neither to spare. I’m lucky if I remember to put on deodorant in the morning. Plus, if you’re not nice to people, they don’t invite you to luncheons and cake and punch gatherings. And if I don't get invited how will I fulfill my duties as the human public address system for food? Getting a promotion doesn't make me any less interested in cake, people.