My husband would shove me down a water slide for a million dollars every day of the week and twice on Sunday

Just because I haven't mention any crappy reality television in awhile doesn't mean I haven't been watching any:

• It's hard to decide which was more of a foregone conclusion: Irina winning Project Runway or Nicole winning America's Next Top Model. No matter how foregone the conclusion though, Project Runway still has me. I always marvel at the talent of the designers and appreciate the fact that it's one of the few reality shows that really does reward actual talent rather than just good looks or the ability to lie and scheme.
  

• I hope the Harlem Globetrotter guys win The Amazing Race. I will never forget them at the top of the water slide in Dubai trash talking the grown woman wearing arm floaties who was too scared to go down a water slide for a million dollars. I will remember that for two reasons. One, what was with the arm floaties? It's not like they could save a grown adult from drowning. And why do you need them on a water slide? Even the water at the bottom isn't really that deep. Just stand up. The other reason I'll remember that water slide standoff is because I know for a fact my husband would have trash talked that chick too. I also know he would never speak to me again if I tried to refuse to go down a water slide for a million dollars. That's assuming he didn't wrestle me onto the slide and shove me down it. But I digress. I like the Globetrotters is what I'm saying. They seem fun and way smarter than I thought they'd be.
  

• I'm dying to find out who wins Survivor this season. I haven't been this curious to get to the winner in quite awhile. Although I started out hating Russell for being arrogant, I've grown to appreciate that he keeps his eyes on the prize when other people are so stupid that they think drawing rocks is a good strategy. Like, yeah, I guess we're friends and teammates but if it comes down to serving you up on a silver platter to save my own neck or risking my own neck, see ya. And for Laura no less. Chick was annoying. I definitely wouldn't be willing to draw rocks for her. Anyway, I'm on the Russell bandwagon now and I get more and more worried about him getting voted out every week. For example, I read online that he's on the next All Stars version of the show and that has me paranoid about why he would do two seasons back to back unless he lost the first time around.
  

• I'm so glad Jon & Kate Plus 8 is over. I hope and pray TLC and corporate America let it die here. Go get real jobs. Stop pretending the paparazzi following you is someone else's fault. You brought it on yourself. Your children are lovely and we all want them to turn out normal. Right the ship already.

• There should be a crappy reality television show about Tiger Woods backing out of his driveway at 2 in the morning fast enough to hit a fire hydrant and a tree causing enough damage to require his wife to knock a window out with a golf club. Seriously. I'm completely riveted waiting for the rest of that story.