The funeral is done. I guess it was nice. The flowers were out of control. The people that spoke were wonderful. The place itself was lovely.
I couldn't really bring myself to turn around and look behind us so I have no idea how many people came. I mostly held my dad's hand and handed out tissues. Today I am drained. Drained of tears and sympathy and explanations for my three year old. Drained of my willingness to discuss the details. She died very quickly and it was awful. She wasn't my mother or my father but I had dinner with her once a week for like forever and I'm very sad that she's gone. I hope today is a better day than yesterday. I hope tomorrow will better than today. And I hope that someday after that things will start to feel normal again.