8.01.2007

How to atone for being an evil hag

I felt like an evil hag recently when I took six weeks to set up a playdate with another mother who had left me several notes and messages. I felt guilty because six weeks seems unreasonable. I felt guilty because she was trying so hard to be nice and I was just lazy and forgetful.

When we finally got on the phone to schedule the playdate, she picked the new Harry Potter book opening weekend. My guilt made me agree. That and my inability to admit to another grown woman that I wanted to stay home and read a children's book instead. My selfless generosity was rewarded by the universe because she ended up having to reschedule. Except what the universe giveth, the universe taketh away. Because the next weekend she wanted to go to Chuck E. Cheese with the kids. My lingering guilt made me feel obligated to agree to that too.

My husband immediately assumed she'd never been there before. He figures every other parent must hate Chuck E. Cheese as much as we do. The noise. The children running around unattended. The overpriced games that last roughly fifteen seconds per token. It's not that we're just total joy killers. We do plenty of other fun things with our kids. Like playgrounds and zoos and swimming. We even let them run amok in the Wal-Mart toy aisle.

But we're not into Chuck E. Cheese. Seriously. Have you been there on Saturday? There are like 97 birthday parties going on at any one time. It's wall to wall people. I asked some wench if we could borrow one of the chairs from her kid's party table and she acted reluctant to part with it. I guess she thought that chair was singlehandedly holding up the huge pile of presents in front of it. Or maybe she thought all the kids at her party were going to simultaneously clone themselves three times and she'd suddenly be out of chairs. I took her chair despite the potentially dire consequences.

My husband exhibited world class patience entertaining our 18 month old at the table while I followed two three year olds from game to game handing out tokens. My daughter's favorite part was the slide. Nevermind the fact that they have that at the playground for free. Nevermind that McDonald's has it too and they even air condition the place and sell soft serve ice cream cones for $1. But whatever. We came. We saw. We hope to never have to go again. I'm sure that means we'll be back next week.

The other mother seems to love Chuck E. Cheese. She's really sweet and followed her kid around the entire time. She even walked over and stood immediately in front of the slide while my husband and I opted to watch from a distance. We may or may not have used the word "hover" to describe that choice but she's still super, super nice. And the kids had a great time. And at least the bathrooms were clean.

8 comments:

no way said...

Hi there-I found your site somehow (through flickr perhaps?) and just wanted to let you know that you're not the only anti-Chuck E parent! I've actually MOVED (after it was already parked) my car in the parking lot of an attached Chuck E/KMart parking lot after realizing I had parked too close to the entrance to C.E.C and didn't want my son to see it. There are certain lines I draw as a parent, and that's one of them. You've got company.

Chaotic Joy said...

I too, despise, Chuck E. Cheese. Really despise it. Everyone can't though, because that place is always full. I'll never understand it.

Happy Working Mom said...

I have to admit I do like Chuck E. Cheese's. We obviously avoid it during busy times (we go weeknights a lot), but I like their pizza and ours has cheap games, so maybe they're different around the country?

But going on a weekend? That would drive me bonkers!

Stacey said...

I have mixed feelings. There is something about Chuck E. Cheese that makes me want to scream anytime the mere suggestion of going there comes up.

But then I think about how much I enjoyed it when I was a kid and give in to the occasional demand to go there.

Good, that you've ridded yourself of your evil haginess ;)

Christy said...

My daughter has no idea what Chuck E Cheese is, and I intend to keep it like that as long as I possibly can :)

Sarahviz said...

You sooooo hated it. I know. We all do.
The germs, my God the germs.
Ack.

a happier girl said...

I'm glad to hear that we're not the only ones that don't like Chuck E. Cheese. And that our daughter had fun but hasn't been asking to go there again. Not yet anyway.

Miguelita said...

I dont know who all these people are who freely schedule their kids bday parties there because ever adult I know refuses to set foot in one. I think its a "Dad has the kids this weekend" kind of place, with vomit. Always reeks of vomit. And the germs! Sarah is right on. They should require vaccinations.

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