I don't have mono but I'm currently doing a great impersonation of someone who does

Every deadline in the universe is due at my work in a three week period. This is the second week of that delightful three week period. Last week, my baby girl decided to turn five, too. I’m not sure who told that kid to go and get herself born during such a busy time of year but what the hay.

On top of annual stuff we have to do every year, the powers that be here in my office decided to compoud our stress by dreaming up magical deadlines that require a magic wand to meet. Then once they were done picking unrealistic deadlines, they decided to brainstorm some extra projects that are supposed to be fun and raise money for charity and hold those during the same period. Super. Because blowing off charitable works makes a person feel good. Kind of like wondering how you'll meet the deadlines without ripping out your hair. I'm baffled by the sheer number of activities and deadlines currently taking place in my building.

My daughter’s birthday last week didn’t really help. Mostly because I’m tired all the time anyway so then planning a party was more work in my already overrun life. I find it difficult not to go over board so it ended up being a whole big thing. Big in the planning sense as opposed to the actual turnout sense. We had three kids show up. Everyone tells me that’s a fantastic turnout when you consider my kid’s only been going to the new school for a month. I suppose I’m satisfied.

Each of the girls that came were the exact girls I would have wanted to come too. Especially the one little girl my daughter has been claiming is her best friend. We did a bounce house and cake like I planned but truth be told the girls were all delighted just getting to play in my daughter’s room. Not that her room is some lap of luxury but I guess it’s fun to show your friends your toys and I guess her friends thought it was fun to play with toys they didn’t own. One little girl didn’t even want to go back outside and tried to convince me to let her play inside by herself. I’ve made a mental note for when my son turns five that we'll skip the bounce house and just send all the kids into his bedroom to play.

So the party was good. Part of me wants to take what I've learned and do it again next year. The other part of me that's quiet and private wants to eliminate parties from now on because the only people that should watch my babies blow out birthday candles are people who love them to the depth of their souls. I'm pretty sure that's just me being overly clingy and sentimental so hopefully I'll mellow out by next year. Especially since the birthday girl had a great time. And she was even sick the day of the party.

The day before the party she claimed her ear hurt and was up all night. We were going to keep her home from school but she was insistent about attending show and tell. It being “H” week she was planning to do a walkthrough on how to appropriately style her My Little Pony horse's mane. Riveting stuff. I’m sure you can understand why she'd need to go to school despite only getting two hours of sleep.

The day of the party she had a fever and wasn’t feeling well. We loaded her up with Tylenol because there was a bounce house busy killing our grass and the show must go on. She perked right up. Especially when her friends started showing up. Once they left, she went right back to laying in bed staring into space.

She likes to lay in our bed to do her staring into space so it should come as no surprise that my husband and I both think we have the bubonic plague now. That works out awesome what with our house still being a mess and my husband potentially going out of town next week. Perfect. To celebrate, I've been doing a lot of laying in bed staring into space. You'd think while laying there I could master programming my DVR. Sadly, despite the time spent horizontal, I’ve had two weeks of operator failure on the DVR front. See, I thought my DVR knew that I love Survivor. Only I guess my DVR apparently thought I ony loved the last season of Survivor. My DVR couldn't figure out on it's own the full and complete name for the new season so my DVR decided that meant I didn’t want to record it. Bad DVR. Bad, bad, bad. No soup for you.

It did the same thing with Amazing Race, too. I successfully figured that out by the second week but then I spaced out and imagined that I fixed the Survivor problem at the same time. Only I didn’t. And then I didn’t notice the problem until I tuned in two minutes before tribal council. And that was the third episode. They’ll be to the merge by the time I get to even see an entire episode. What on Earth. I heard there's a hot guy with an Irish accent too. This is so not my week.

On the other hand, how cute was The Office. For example, please tell me you saw Jim propose last week. Why does my husband not invite me to rendevouz at rainy gas stations more often? And was it just me or was it completely obvious who was going to go to Fashion Week on Project Runway. For real. Leanne was money in the bank after you saw her two dresses. And as astronomically annoying as Kinley has become you can’t deny she’s talented. And I do mean astronomically. Like, maybe Leanne and Korto did short bridesmaid dresses because they wanted to not because they were trying to copy you, Kinley. Did you ever think of that? Speaking of Korto, I hated her wedding dress but she’s so talented she had to move on. In fact, I used to think Korto was going to win. Although now I’m thinking Leanne. But would it kill Leanne to brush her hair a little more?