My son is BFF with Abraham Lincoln

My kids' school had open house night recently.  I'm pretty sure I'm supposed to be excited to attend this event.  This time I was a little tired and ready to catch up on some crappy reality television burning a hole in my DVR.  My seven year old was ready to drag me around the school and show me all his crap.  Demanding kid.  Sheesh.

First up was a star display in the hallway.  According to my kid, he sparkles because he's strong.  Interesting. 

Here's a blurry photo of my baby standing in front of his sparkly composition. 

His teacher must not realize his work needs to be hung lower so I can shove his face next to it for a photo.  Silly woman. 

Next to that was the classic self portrait.  Always a hit with us parental types. 

If your first instinct is to wonder if a I gave birth to a brown raindrop, you are not alone.  My baby claims that's him with his hair in a Mohawk.  The fact that he currently doesn't have enough hair to form a Mohawk did not deter him.   

Next up we dropped by the art gallery displaying this original work.  Profile #1 on loan from the artist's personal collection.

I tried to suggest he stand staring into the profile's eyes.  He tried to suggest that wasn't going to be happening. 

On to the classroom!  Where my baby blew my mind by successfully maneuvering a mouse to show me the slide show he made. 

The hand in the mouth kills me.  So cute I could eat it for dinner.

Then he hit play on the narration he recorded to accompany it.  In his own little seven year old voice.  Boom.  That's the sound of my mind being blown that this kid is savvy enough to be doing stuff like that at school.  Hold me.

At his desk, a pep rally for America was waiting for me.

My personal favorite was that my kid is such close personal friends with Abraham Lincoln that he now refers to him simply as "Abe."

Do not bother asking me what the hell those last two sentences say.  He's got some good stuff going at the beginning about perseverance and wearing a tall hat.  But I'm lost from there.

George Washington was apparently good at math.  Who knew?

But the best was definitely the timeline of John F. Kennedy's life.

Born.  Got married under a Christmas tree.  Became president of the Alamo.

And then he was killed.  And apparently everyone was sad. 

Way better than a literal drawing of what happened and yet still wildly fascinating.  Which is sort of my kid in a nutshell.  Gotta love it.