Envy is occasionally okay

A girl I work with recently returned from maternity leave. She looks smaller now than she did before she was pregnant. And she was like a size 2 to start with. She looks rock star awesome 4 months out from having a baby. She’s super nice too. And not fake nice. Sincere nice. So why does it annoy me to think about how fabulous she looks? What does that say about me? Clearly, it says I’m feeling down on myself for not being where she is. I’ve flaked on my big diet plans. I’ve let everything else slide while I got used to a Dr. Pepper free existence. Which is kinda pathetic but there it is. Fourteen days later drinking water is finally starting to feel like a habit instead of a monumental sacrifice. And I think I finally feel capable of more. Yesterday I started walking again. I used to walk everyday. I know this is something I can do. I know it will be great for me. Best of all, this morning my number was 161. That's even more inspiring than a fabulously skinny new mom six cubes down.