Those are the letters I cut out several weeks ago. Instead of just taping them to the wall I taped them to a piece of blue poster board. I'll be taking a job at Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia next week based on those superior design skills. And the large pink mushroom in the middle of the table is actually the cake:
It's supposed to be a giant cupcake. It somehow ended up looking more like a house for Smurfette. I made it using the giant Wilton cupcake pan. I think the pan itself is exceptionally cute but I couldn't find anywhere on the packaging about how much cake mix to use or what temperature to bake it at. So my cake was pretty much screwed from the get go. And I was up sick the night before. Like laying on the bathroom floor waiting to throw up sick. So I was mostly just happy to get myself vertical long enough to move the mixer around in the bowl for 90 seconds. Oh, and we didn't have any flour. Martha Stewart has explained to me several times the importance of greasing and then lightly flouring the pan so your cake will fall right out. Mine was more of a pry job. So maybe flour would have helped too.
Once the cake was out of the pan, I started mixing shades of pink. For reasons that are unclear to me now I decided I needed 4 shades of pink. Seriously. Stab my eyes out next time I decide 4 shades of pink sounds right. They all started blurring together in one horrific Pepto nightmare.
An hour later I actually had some icing bags loaded and ready to go and started making pink squiggles on top of the cake. I was going for a paisley-ish design. Things quickly spun out of control and I ended up with more of Jackson Pollock gone wrong feel. My husband claims he loves it. So does the newest 4 year old. Although she likes anything pink so whatever.
Besides the cake and Pepto explosion, we also hit the zoo. Here's my husband giving us a nice visual of how he feels about paying $2 for a bottle of water.
The $2 water must have robbed him of his senses because then he went and threw a half eaten chicken nugget to the tigers despite all the don't feed the animals signs posted everywhere. It literally bounced off the tiger's paw. And then he took a picture of his handiwork to prove it:
I'm not sure what they serve the tigers for dinner around there, but it's apparently better than cold half eaten chicken nuggets. That tiger couldn't even be bothered to sniff the nugget let alone eat it. Having said that, please don't feed the animals at the zoo. Because that's bad for the animals. And they'll take away your zoo membership or something if they catch you. But my husband's a nut job so he doesn't care. Just look what I'm up against:
The newest 4 year old also received
We call her "Torso Doll." So does the newest 4 year old. Because she heard her idiot parents calling it that. Torso Doll came with some glitter nail polish. I think it's actually glitter water but I'm not sure. I'm hoping it wasn't made in China because she's been polishing my entire body with the stuff for the last three days.
And now she's four. And she even looks four. That stupid new haircut made sure of that. I'd like to tell you she's still my little baby. But she's not. And I miss that baby she was. But now it's the little girl I'd be lost without. She is the light of my life. I feel lucky to have spent the last 4 years with her. And lucky to be the mother stirring the 4 shades of pink icing to make her birthday the best it could it be. Because it was was the best. Just like her.