1. My children covered in bubbles in the jacuzzi tub at the fancy schmancy boutique hotel. I'm partial to the one of my son wearing a Santa-esque bubble beard.
2. My husband bed hogging in the miniature full sized bed at the fancy schmancy boutique hotel.
3. My family's ability to trash a perfectly lovely hotel room at the fancy schmancy boutique hotel.
4. Zero pictures of Shamu because my kid fell and busted her chin open in the water park area at Sea World before we even got to see him. I know. What the hell. $134 to get in and we didn't even get to see Shamu. And everyone we encountered at the emergency room where we went to get her chin glued back together kept asking if we at least got to see Shamu before it happened. Um, no. But thanks for pointing that out to the kid who already thinks her day went to hell in a hand basket. Although, no one needs to feel sorry for that kid because her father and I sprang for an overpriced horse drawn carriage ride the next day and it's the first thing she tells everyone when they ask about her trip.
5. The new 50 inch television my husband bought himself that turned out to have a hole in the screen when we opened the box. I'm proud to say I restrained my laughter in the face of his utter disappointment. He'd cleared a spot to put it and everything.
6. The 4 rooms we ended up painting in our house even though we both agreed we were only painting the tiny half bath and hall. I came out of the bathroom after 30 minutes of touch up painting to discover all the furniture in our front room stacked up and covered with a drop cloth. It reminded me vaguely of the time we agreed to stop for the night in Tennessee on a cross country drive but woke up at 2 am to discover we were in Virginia.
7. The newly whitened 50 year old grout in our half bath. I'd like to explain how I bleached it but I'm pretty sure all the tile whitener crap did was paint it. I'm fine with that though because it looks way better and should hold up long enough for us to sell this house.
8. My children standing on the roof of the playhouse in our living room. Before you have kids, you think that sort of thing would give you a heart attack. I'm here to tell you the initial shock wears off quickly. Then you even start to convince yourself it's a good way to wear off some energy as long as there are pillows on the floor and no pushing is allowed.
9. My son wearing lipstick after his sister used him as her real life Torso doll. There was also some fingernail polish involved.
10. The skinhead that is supposedly my baby boy. My husband claims he told the lady at Super Cut the wrong number on the razor. I haven't decided yet whether or not I believe him. What I know for a fact is that "number 5" is the incorrect setting for my baby's hair because I do not enjoy the "just got to boot camp" look on my baby. The child has his whole life to annoy me with his hair. Let's maintain cute baby curls while we can.